Your Neighbor in Real Estate: So How Many Unwanted Guests Did You Have at Your T-Day Table and Were You One of Them?

So How Many Unwanted Guests Did You Have at Your T-Day Table and Were You One of Them?

So How Many Unwanted Guests Did You Have at Your T-Day Table and Were You One of Them?

At this time last year, Turkey Day 2010, we only had one “univited Guest.” This year, we had five, count ‘em five.Thanksgiving

I am, of course, speaking of those dreaded ‘conversation killers’ otherwise know as a hand-held device. I am generalizing to include multifunctional cell phones, all tablets, laptops, DS,  and whatever else I’m too old school to know about.

Here we are all together, but not all together. The younger generation is keeping tabs on their friends who are also dissing their own gathering by texting the ones at mine. We have a rule about no devices at the table, but being in their own world and not participating in the party-get together is just as bad.

Even watching a football game together is better than the sole diversion of the hand-held. Because at least you can  cheer, groan, laugh and bet together. If you approach someone staring zombie-like at their hand-held, they close the screen immediately. Hmmm, makes you wonder.
 
It’s not like I’m against any of these ‘doohickies.’ They are great babysitters sometimes, and the kids are not fighting with each other when they are clearing the kingdom of zombies and the like. But, there is a time and a place (Gosh, who do I sound like?). I have my own “Words with Friends” addiction~ let me know if you want to play~ but seriously not on Thanksgiving, Christmas or at any family party.... work is OK, lol.

I finally put my foot down (it got tired, being up in the air and all), and banned anything with a chip in it. And boy, did those chips then go on the shoulders.

But I didn’t care, and we then had a good old fashioned Thanksgiving, prayer and all.

 

Hope yours was good too!

 


Sandy Acevedo ~Your Neighbor in Real Estate ~ Whether it is to buy or sell property

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Comment balloon 59 commentsSandy Acevedo • November 28 2011 02:27PM

Comments

Oh one of my pet peeves.  One time I actually texted my daughter at dinner out to turn off her phone.  And Thanksgiving was perfect... at my mom's house .... which has NO cell service.

Posted by Tammy Lankford,, Broker GA Lake Sinclair/Eatonton/Milledgeville (Lane Realty Eatonton, GA Lake Sinclair, Milledgeville, 706-485-9668) about 8 years ago

"No cell service," now that is too funny and just perfect!!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Sandy, it time there will be chapters all over the world for I-AppAA.  These things really should be considered more "me-phones" than "I-phones"---to put the emphasis where it belongs.  That said I think they are awesome---but people are not using them as a tool---they seem to be filling that hole inside themselves----remember that hole?  We all used to have one :)

Posted by Charles Buell, Seattle Home Inspector (Charles Buell Inspections Inc.) about 8 years ago

'doohickies'?  them's fightin' words.

 

guilty as charged.

Posted by Alan May, Helping you find your way home. (Jameson Sotheby's International Realty) about 8 years ago

Why Alan May, I'm surprised at you. Did you think I would not see that teeny-tiny font saying, 'guilty as charged'?

 

 

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Hi Charles, I agree that they are awesome, which will make starting those chapters very hard as the addicts will not think they have a problem, which is Step 1.

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Sometimes those "things" can spoil a great evening with family. Time and place for everything.

Posted by Robert L. Brown, Grand Rapids Real Estate Bellabay Realty, West Mic (www.mrbrownsellsgr.com) about 8 years ago

It's ironic that a lot of the devices that are designed to make it easier to connect actually end up pushing us further apart. Every home (and restaurant) should have a 'no devices at the table' rule; we need to get back to real face-to-face interaction.

Posted by John Novak, Henderson, Las Vegas and Summerlin Real Estate (Keller Williams Realty The Marketplace) about 8 years ago

So true, Robert. Exactly what I mean!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Hi John, that is absolutely right! I never thought of it that way, but yes, they are pushing people apart. Nice take on that!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Sandy, we had three and yes I was one of them. Only because one of our cousins wrote a post on Facebook that I had read early Thanksgiving morning. I felt  it needed to be shared with everyone at the Thanksgiving Table especially those who do not participate in Facebook. It was about how she knew she grew up poor but never realized it. She talked about how thankful she was for the the solid traditional family values that her parents and my grandparents raised all of them with. It was a beautiful tribute to her parents and to all of her family closeby and those far away. So, in this case social media helped remind all of us where we came from and how far we've come.

 

Posted by Peggy James, Woodbridge Virginia Area Real Estate Specialist (EXIT Realty Associates) about 8 years ago

Nope. None. I threaten to destroy devices when they bother me. 10 years later, my kids still remember when I held a Gameboy over the kitchen sink with the disposal running. It makes the point quite nicely.

Posted by Leslie Ebersole, I help brokers build businesses they love. (Swanepoel T3 Group) about 8 years ago

OK, Peggy, good one, you're excused. No really, these things are great when they bring people together, like yours did. It was a tribute worth hearing and knowing about. It is when it is a solo endeavor and there is no human interaction that I complain about.

 

Hi Leslie, And I can just see you doing that. Many a time I remember threatening to throw things out just like that. Thanks for the memory.

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Way to go - Thanksgiving is a family time and time to celebrate each other and all or our abudance!  I am proud of you and don't even know you! :) 

Posted by Joy Daniels (Joy Daniels Real Estate Group, Ltd.) about 8 years ago

It's too bad really, things seem to have declined in the direct communication business.

Posted by Brian Madigan, LL.B., Broker (RE/MAX West Realty Inc., Brokerage (Toronto)) about 8 years ago

You are a funny lady. I can honestly say no one was looking at their phones at the table I was at, nor e "teen" table next to it. From what I saw!!

Posted by Kristin Moran, San Antonio,TX - Real Estate - 210-313-7397 (Owner - RE/MAX Access - KristinMoran@Remax.net) about 8 years ago

Well, nice to meet you Joy. Thanks for being proud of me. I am too!

 

Hi Brian, you are so right. But let's get it back!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Hi Kristin, Yay for your table and teen one too. So now I know you had a good one, with all that face-to-face communication!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Hi Sandy! Good for you for putting your foot down! I think looking at a phone at the dinner table, or even when entertaining friends, is about the rudest thing a person can do! It drives me crazy!

Posted by Rose King, Friendswood / Pearland / Houston Bay Area (David Tracy Real Estate) about 8 years ago

Hi Rose, drives me crazy too and it is soooo rude, I agree. Unless there is a true emergency, there is no call for it during these times.

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

I'm with you all the way on this one.  There is a time to turn off all the devices and get back to the basics.. and real relationships and contact with folks.  I love the technology, but there are times to put in on hold.

Posted by Joan Whitebook, Consumer Focused Real Estate Services (BHG The Masiello Group) about 8 years ago

DIdn't have too much trouble with that on Thanksgiving, but it certainly is tough to carry on a conversation with someone who is texting.

Posted by Melissa Zavala, Broker, Escondido Real Estate, San Diego County (Broadpoint Properties) about 8 years ago

I had Thanksgiving dinner in my parents house. They have no cellphone reception in their neck of the woods so thankfully there was no reason to have a cellphone at the table!

Posted by Ciara Brennan (Mass Homes Realty) about 8 years ago

Sandy, it's great to say that we did not have any unwanted guests and as for the electronic devised, well...  I was the only one checking mine here and there.

Posted by Steve Warrene, Pittsburgh Real Estate Investment Specialists (Your Town Realty) about 8 years ago

Sometimes the phones just need to be out away. Dinner time, everyday, but especially holidays with extended family present, is a mist at my house. How rude to be on your phone while we are having dinner and sharing memories about those that have passed or those that are not able to be theredue to distance or health. 

Posted by Karen Feltman, Relocation Specialist in Cedar Rapids, Iowa (Cedar Rapids/Iowa City, IA KW Legacy Group) about 8 years ago

Sandy, good for you. One rule: no devices at the dinner table. That includes my own.

Posted by Tammie White, Broker, Franklin TN Homes for Sale (Franklin Homes Realty LLC) about 8 years ago

Sandy....none!  Not a one!  Not allowed.  We had 40 people....and get this...only my 72 year old dad brought his out!  It's about family...not PDAs or cell phones!  Good post!

Posted by Larry Bettag, Vice-President of National Production (Cherry Creek Mortgage Illinois Residential Mortgage License LMB #0005759 Cherry Creek Mortgage NMLS #: 3001) about 8 years ago

We definitely had a basket that we put our devices in BEFORE dinner. Helps keep us together.

Posted by Ben Blonder, Buyers, Sellers, Investors! (Broker/Owner, Keller Williams) about 8 years ago

The dodads and widgits have no place at the Thanksgiving day table.  What ever happened to the dinner hour anyway - was it destroyed in one final tweet-fest.

Posted by Ruthmarie Hicks (Keller Williams NY Realty - 120 Bloomingdale Road #101, White Plains NY 10605) about 8 years ago

Sandy:

I love this post.  And, yes we had one uninvited guest at our table.  My daughter, who is old enough to know better, kept texting her friends during dinner.  What happened to conversation during dinner?

Posted by Evelyn Kennedy, Alameda, Real Estate, Alameda, CA (Alain Pinel Realtors) about 8 years ago

Hi Joan, We are on the same page. Thanks for stopping by.

Hi Melissa, not only tough, but it is rude of them too.

Clara, I love that (not for always), but for these kinds of times. And tell me, did everyone survive the no cell phone withdrawals?

Hi Steve, Looks like your kidlets are too young for texting, but 10 lashes with a  wet noodle for you!

Karen, you and I are in total agreement! It is rude and disrespectful.

Well said, Tammie! Especially my own, must practice what you preach.

Hi Larry, that many people and only your dad checked his phone? That has to be a record!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Hi Ben, that is a fantastic idea! But I don't know if that would fly in my house. What is that saying, about 'prying it away from my cold dead hands.' That's the feeling these kids have. But, then again , who is the boss? Um, sounds like another post.

Hi Ruthmarie, Amen. That's funny ~ the final tweet-fest~.

Hi Evelyn, It is customary to wonder about the next generation but, really, how are they going to handle this type of etiquette in the future when they're the grownups?

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Sandy - LOL  You're so funny and Leslie too!  I can just picture her threatening her kids with throwing their gameboys down the disposal.  As for our Thanksgiving table?  No devices at the table but plenty of FBing and picture sharing after dinner and during dessert.  Mostly by the adults!  LOL

Posted by Donne Knudsen, CalState Realty Services (Los Angeles & Ventura Counties in CA) about 8 years ago

You did the right thing! I was amazed last week when I was in a restaurant, glanced at a table of 4, next to me, and saw all four people sending text messages rather than visiting with each other.

Posted by Sharon Parisi, Dallas Homes (United Real Estate Dallas ) about 8 years ago

Hi Donne, you're excused too. Gathering around looking at pictures together during dessert is a good thing and not at all what I meant. Good job on the table!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Hi Sharon, that is exactly what I mean and what I have witnessed too. Just amazing!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

We had no uninvited guests because we had not children or young adults.  I am amazed when I am around my 20-somthingish nephews who will interrupt any conversation you are having with them to respond to a text.  I love my iPhone but not to the point where civility disappears.  Good call you made with ban those hand helds.

Posted by Janet Jones, Home Staging, Interior Redesign Kihei, Maui, Hawaii (Just Your Style Interiors, LLC) about 8 years ago

I guess you expected everyone to be present for the event. Imagine how the meal woud have turned out if you had tuned out during prep time!

Posted by Cheryl Ritchie, Southern Maryland 301-980-7566 (RE/MAX Leading Edge www.GoldenResults.com) about 8 years ago

I put my Iphone down just long enough to eat and then raced right back to it! I never was addicted to video games but I sure seem stuck to my computer now that I am in business for myself! 

 

Posted by Rosalie Evans, The Evans Group, Sioux Falls, SD Homes For Sale (Meritus Group Real Estate) about 8 years ago

Hi Janet, yes,that is another pet peeve too. You are talking to them and they text first.

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago
I'm pleased to say that we didn't have one! The football game was the only one giving the turkey a little competition!
Posted by Kerry Lucasse, Your Urban Nest Atlanta Real Estate Consultant (eXp Realty - Urban Nest Real Estate Group) about 8 years ago
..... I'm happy to hear that you put your foot down! Hope it was a great day!
Posted by Kerry Lucasse, Your Urban Nest Atlanta Real Estate Consultant (eXp Realty - Urban Nest Real Estate Group) about 8 years ago

Sandy,  OMG what a great post!!!  lol,  but truly they are so darn rude.  I have a son whom is always texting, HOWEVER when I send him a text it could be hours or days until he responds.  We ate early this year, and I am thinking... we did not have any uninvited guests at the table.  Everyone had theirs in hand after wards, but not in dinner.  Hope your day was Blessed!

Posted by Joan Valverde, GRI,CDPE,CNE,MRP,SRES Colo Sprgs, Blk Forest, Monu (Synergy Realty Group Inc) about 8 years ago

Hi Cheryl, too funny. And you're right, I did do a lot of prep and totally focused too. I will bring that up next time.

 

Hi Rosalie, congrats on admitting to this addiction. But seriously, did anything really important happen on Thanksgiving that warranted racing back to it? Be honest!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Hi Kerry, Congrats on hand-held free table. And yes, it was a great day, and the turkey was good!

 

Hi Joan, too funny that he answers everyone else right away, but to you, it is days. Thanks for stopping by.

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Oh my, I can't imagine those at the Thanksgiving table.  Not cool at all.  you're so right,..no one else can engage in that text conversation. It's very rude.

Posted by Debbie Gartner, The Flooring Girl & Blog Stylist -Dynamo Marketers (The Flooring Girl) about 8 years ago

Hilarious! I loved the way you sucked us in with the headline.

Posted by Michelle Cherie CarrCrowe Just Call...408-252-8900, Family Helping Families Buy & Sell Homes 40+ Years (Get Results Team...Just Call (408) 252-8900! . DRE #00901962 . Licensed to Sell since 1985 . Altas Realty) about 8 years ago

FYI, I thought the unwanted guests were going to be termites or ants.

Posted by Michelle Cherie CarrCrowe Just Call...408-252-8900, Family Helping Families Buy & Sell Homes 40+ Years (Get Results Team...Just Call (408) 252-8900! . DRE #00901962 . Licensed to Sell since 1985 . Altas Realty) about 8 years ago

Hi Sandy -This is a great post! They are encroaching everywhere, but some things just must be kept sacred! I hope you had a great Thanksgiving!

Posted by Peggy Chirico, REALTOR® 860-748-8900, Hartford & Tolland County Real Estate (Prudential CT Realty) about 8 years ago

I laughed when I saw your title.  Great subject.  Now, I'm wondering if I was a welcome guest or they just had me over because I deep fried the Turkey!

Posted by Gabe Sanders, Stuart Florida Real Estate (Real Estate of Florida specializing in Martin County Residential Homes, Condos and Land Sales) about 8 years ago

Sandy,

Oh I just can't stand it, it is incredibly rude and dismissive of the "live" people in front of you. I need to discuss with my husband as his adult son does this constantly when he comes over. Life is short and one day the person sitting in front of you won't be there anymore and you wasted valuable time with a virtual "buddy". Great post!

Posted by Valerie Duncan Stewart, Real Estate Agent-Broker, OKC, OK ((Metro First Realty)) about 8 years ago

I know exactly how you feel.  I have one nephew that seems to have his Nintendo DS surgically attached to him.  He doesn't even look up long enough to say hello as he's coming in the door.

Posted by S. Leanne Paynter ☼ Broward County, FL, Davie, Plantation, Cooper City & Weston Specialist (United Realty Group, Inc.) about 8 years ago

yes I was at the mother in laws in the country where my phone doesn't work. But I find that it's ok for me to be on my phone whenever I want because obviously that's important but other people shouldn't be so rude

Posted by Adam Todd (LeadTrader PRO) about 8 years ago

I have to laugh at the word Doo-hickey, I have not heard that word in a very long time.  It reminded me of my mother when she would say "someone put a bee in their bonnet", when someone was mad. We don't have cell phones at our table either, that was taken care of in the beginning when they first got the cell phones.  Seems to me the kids eat really fast though. LOL.

Posted by Mary Stewart, Wilsonville and Surrounding Portland Metro Areas (HomeTrust Real Estate, LLC, Homes for Everyone) about 8 years ago

Hi Debbie, worse than eating with your mouth full, lol.

Hi Michelle, love when that happens with the title and (gasp) no ants or termites either!

Hi Peggy, encroaching is the right word, I like that! Like they're sneaking in and taking over...

Hi Gabe, believe me, if you fry a turkey, you are welcome anyplace, anytime. Just don't do it with a hand-held~ too dangerous~ lol.

Hi Valerie, i like the you put that ~ Live vs virtual. Thanks for commenting!

Hi Leanne, they become zombie-like. My youngest grandson wouldn't  stop even to go to the bathroom.

Hi Adam, you are too funny.

Hi Mary, yes, it is a good old fashioned word. Did you notice if any of the adults left real fast too? Not just a kid problem.

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

At my table the unwanted guests to me are the ones that grab food with their hands or personal forks and not the utensils that were put out just for that purpose. We have almost 20 people at the table so a few are bound to do something wrong, right?

Posted by Rob Ernst, Reno, NV-775-410-4286 Inspector & Energy Auditor (Certified Structure Inspector) about 8 years ago

Hi Robert, Sounds like you had some grubby handed people there. But when a lot of people congregate, there's bound to be a good time! Hope it went well!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

Sandy,  Fortunately, my husband and I had Thanksgiving to ourselves.  Our son and his girl friend were there for part of the day, but they had another dinner to go to.  By the time they left, I was thrilled!

I dion't know about you, but I was trained that when guests are in your home, you pay attention to them and have conversations.  Our son and his girlfriend had their noses in their laptops almost the whole time.  I got monosyllables in answer to my questions and comments. These aren't teenagers either, they are grownups!  Makes me so crazy!

Posted by Marge Draper, REALTOR, Keller Williams Realty, Menlo Park CA (Keller Williams Realty Palo Alto) about 8 years ago

Hi Marge, I KNOW!!! Adults are being as rude as teenagers!!

Posted by Sandy Acevedo, RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale (951-290-8588) about 8 years ago

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